A trip down body memory lane

Before I start, let me tell you that this post will undergo a nice little edit
after I have visited the photoalbum and brought my scanner home from those
that have borrowed it from me.

You know, I am not a sentimental guy, at least not as much as I could be, and
I think that part of that is that I dont like to live in my past. Pherhaps that
could be because my past hasn’t been the very best. But, I have somethings
that I dwell on from time to time. Obviously the birth of my son is one
of them, the other is how I met my girlfriend. One that isn’t such a profound
event, but yet, stays in my mind, is how my body has changed during the years.

I have passed 30. I am 32 to be exact, and in todays society, that is not considered
old in any way, there are still people that has 10 more years then me, that still
has that healthy, toned body and yet, here I am, carrying around a lot more luggage
then is considered healthy. Let me fill you in a little bit.

I used to be a gym-o-holic. A bad one at that because it also affected my view
of the world. I was obnoxious, loud and pretty much appearing to be narcissistic.
To a degree I guess I was. To pretty much everyone I had that attitude that simply
walked on peoples nerves and annoyed them. However, the cause for that behaviour
was as at least some people have guessed, insecurity and low self esteem. I still
suffer from that low self esteem and I do occasionally revert to being obnoxious
but everytime I do, I get a little bit sad inside aswell, because I dont want to
be the loudmouth who everyone see. I want to have the security to just be me.
Anyway, I am wandering off the subject here, lets get back on track.

Seeing that I actually ditched school and cut classes to work out I had a nice
toned body with pherhaps a trifle too much muscle to look good, but still
I didn’t feel safe to blatantly display it as some people do.

I met my girlfriend, we hooked up and well, even though I worked out some
it became more and more infrequent to suddenly come to a grinding stop.
However, I did the mistake of not adjusting my intake to the lessened physical
exertion, so naturally, I gained weight. A lot of weight. I was up at 125 kilos at
the most, now, I am stable in my weight, albeit not that much, but still too much
for comfort, and frankly, my body has forgotten how to exersice. Another factor
is that I am eating entirely wrong. I used to eat 3 square meals a day, with 2 snacks.
Never mind what those meals contained, because at that time, it didn’t much matter.
I could burn it away in a multitude of ways.

Now, I eat 1 meal a day and drink way too much coffee and the occasional soda.
See the problem?

I do. Pretty much right away. I can promise to adjust that, I can promise to start to
exersice again. But you know what? That wont do any good. Because, as is common
when one already is overweight, I can find tons of bad excuses not to. Want a little
list of bad excuses that works for pretty much everything? Ok, here we go

  1. I dont have any time to do X because my day is so filled with other things.
  2. I will start tomorrow, next week, next month (insert own timeframe)
  3. Blaming others.

Now, when it comes to the first, apply that to food. Now, an ovengrilled chicken,
with cottage cheese, some cucumber, paprika and other veggies DONT TAKE TIME.
Sure the chicken needs time in the oven, but it doesn’t go faster because you stand there
looking at it. During the grilling, you can do whatever you please. Cottage cheese doesnt
take time, its just to open the damn box.
Apply it to smoking. Well, smoking actually TAKES time, so quitting that habit
actually just gives you more time. Voila!

The second on the list is just an ecxuse to push it forward and can be used with
whatever event lies nearest. Listen to this: I will start to eat healthy after the
weekend because we are going to a dinner at X place and theres bound to be
a lot of food that I cant eat while on a diet.

Then the next weekend comes and you say, I will start monday, just let me
eat junkfood this weekend. A convicted last meal if you will.

WHO ARE YOU KIDDING. If you are using this excuse, its most likely
because as me, you are unsure that you have the motivation to do start
and are afraid of failure.

The third reason. That is pretty much just projecting your feelings and
causes unto others so you wont feel as guilty.

Now, I know who is to blame for my overweight. Its not you, my parents, my girlfriend
or anything else. It’s me. Me, myself and I and noone else. But what to do about this?
Well, what I should have done ages ago. Man up, take the blame for my failure to
keep fit and ask someone who knows about these things to help me with planning
and to help with motivation.

I am telling you this as one overweight person to another. We can do this. Dont
come up with sad excuses, lets team up, keep eachother motivated, help eachother
to loose that extra tire we have around our midsections.

And to you skinny, well-trained toned individuals. If you want to help an
overweight person, go right ahead. The person who is overweight is most
likely so for a reason. One is insecurity, one is overeating. But let me tell
you something, mr/ms Toned. The gratitude you would get from helping
an overweight person, without scorn or pity, will be neverending and you
will get a true, loyal friend in the process. Wouldn’t that be worth some
of your time?

Lets get to work.